Missing The Ones Ive Lost

~If tears could build a stairway,And memories a lane,I'd walk right up to Heaven And bring you home again.~

 

I'm just having one of those days of when im missing the people that i have lost in my life. my mamaw was one of the important people in my life that i have lost to lung cancer even though she stopped smoking for i think it was 10 years she never gave a sign of it or anything until one day out of the blue it just hit her. i felt in my heart that something was wrong and then i was told that thats what she had it broke my heart because i knew it could be any time. i was pregnant with my daughter hailey when i found out she was diagnosed with lung cancer. i went up to my mamaw and i said " please can you try to make it until you see your great grand daughter hailey?" and she said " Yes I will hold on so i can hold her and kiss her." made me cry cuz she made it to see her and i wish she was here i really miss her i miss talking to her getting phone calls on holidays and even birthdays. and going over to her house and eating her yummy cooking :D. i never ever will take for granted my mom cuz you never know when you might not have her in your life anymore. i know now my mamaw is not suffering and is in a better place but im being selfish right now i want her back i want her here to be with us i miss you so very much and i love you..